Three annoying phrases we should all ban
Sorry for the lack of posts recently – I may need to shimmy down to one a week for the time being while I rebalance 2016 life. I’m sure once my new year resolutions begin to wane, I’ll be back up to twice a week. And to continue with my more streamlined (or lazy… however you choose to view it) approach, this pet hate is an evolvement from stand up comedian Nick Doody’s routine I saw last week. My phrases are different though, promise.
1. It’ll happen when you least expect it
If you’ve ever been single when your mates haven’t been I can almost guarantee you’ve been fed this line. It comes from a good place but I really don’t like it.
Have I ever found in the times when I’ve been single or looking for a job or looking for a house or any of those kind of things, that it happened when I least expected it? Well no, not really. Expecting is the first cousin of wanting, and if I don’t expect it, I’m not trying for it, you get me. So if I am trying, don’t tell me to stop. And if I’m not trying, I don’t want it.
Also see: if it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be
This is a personal bugbear of mine. This England public transport favourite takes a normal, everyday phrase – ‘it’s wet’ – and turns it into something well, bizarre, frankly. I work with words and I can confidently say I’ve never heard this used anywhere else.
I know the weather is a big deal to us, but that doesn’t mean we have to invent new ways to talk about it. Otherwise, this phrase really needs to be included in English guide books.
Also see: It’s raining cats and dogs
3.Chilling with my bae
‘Hey, what are you up to tonight?’ ‘Ah, not much, just chilling with bae’. This is a conversation that should just NOT happen.
Babe is nice. Babe can be chummy or sexy. Bae on the other hand – it sounds like you’re trying to be Pharrell Williams. You’re failing at being Pharrell Williams.
Also see: Netflix and chill
Image attribution: Jan Balaz, Flickr